This Blog is for YOU...

If you are/were Gender Dysphoric - so as to know some from me and share some with me, and reaffirm that none of us is alone... To acknowledge that we have a treasure of insurmountable Courage, Strength and Hope in us. I have a feeling that we were given slightly higher quantities of those special gifts :-) [If you have a question to ask me, you could write it as a Comment to one of the posts, and either I would reply to it as a Comment itself, or probably, respond in one of the future posts on this blog]

If you have never been Gender Dysphoric - so as to understand what it means to have a Gender Identity Disorder. Of course, it primarily depends on whether you want to or not. If you don't, please do make a quiet exit and try not to be a nuisance.

If you're confused - so as to realize that everybody goes through a stage of confusion - the period could be short, or sometimes, very long. What is important is to acknowledge that being unsure until you're sure is as normal and as alright as night before day.

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If you're a human being - so as to find out for yourself whether you want to try to make the world a better place to live in, for every fellow human being, irrespective of their health, wealth, colour, race, gender, religion and any and every other line of division you can think of.

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And finally, this blog is for ME - so as to be able to make some difference somewhere by sharing my experiences, and along the way, slowly grow out of those anxieties and insecurities that have inhabited my life for over 2 decades. It is time to escort them to the door now!

Come, Join me on this journey!

Saturday, January 30, 2010

A Dost Story



I have written a piece titled 'Facing the Mirror' for the latest issue of India's first magazine for sexual minorities. The magazine is called 'Bombay Dost', and the issue is now out. You can catch a glimpse of it at the link below, but the Preview has only one page of my article. To read the entire conversation, catch hold of a personal copy [The link also says where and how to get it].

Hope you enjoy reading it, and do give me your feedback! :)

Bombay Dost Preview

111 comments:

  1. You look beautiful.

    ReplyDelete
  2. What do you think about Bobby Darling?Is she a 'true transsexual'?Do you think she is sending a wrong image of our community to the masses?She dresses bizarrely. She is clumsy. She often goes out of her way to describe her love for men.
    She still looks rather guy-ish. I presume that she is on HRT but she has absolutely no curves. Why is that?
    There is a HUGE difference between her and you.I know.I'm not comparing you with her. So please do not dismiss my comment as offensive.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Is it possible to hide the effects of HRT for 3 years?I'm 18.

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  4. gazal!!!
    watching ur pics and listening to ur voice... i often wonder..wat is that in u that made u the beautiful t-gal in india.. i feel indian society look at two things specially in t-girl(gal) feminity in face and voice... u have acheived both...how is it possible... the passion to be a girl... or the fire inside..?? treatment?? family support or financial support???
    hey!!!
    waiting to see ur pics in saree dear??
    i'm 18 ... planning for Harmones...

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  5. gazal plz can u post topics n infos related to the issue n doctors n all guide lines in india like . lynn conway n andrea did in there websites ?? please - ?

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  6. happy valentime day gazal from babal

    ReplyDelete
  7. This is a question on behalf of many people in who wish to begin hormone therapy. How do we go about finding a doctor in our local city who will prescribe hormone replacement therapy, without abusing us or publicly humiliating us? Can we create a list of such doctors and gender counselors and surgeons from various cities in India?

    ReplyDelete
  8. n yup is there any surgn u can recommnd in india for facial feminine surgry ?

    ReplyDelete
  9. ShemaleJasmin ye kya maachodi hai

    ReplyDelete
  10. I watched your interview on CNN-IBN , i could not believe that you are a TG . You would have passed on for a genetic woman if you did had not revealed your identity. You look so feminine and Dashing ....... Could you please post some of your Pics in Saree? I had developed a kind of fantasy for you.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Special Note to Those Thinking About a Sex Change,
    by Danielle Berry
    [Compiled from a number of emails I sent in response to requests for input from those considering their own change.]

    Don't do it! That's my advice. This is the most awful, most expensive, most painful, most disruptive thing you could ever do. Don't do it unless there is no other alternative. You may think your life is tough but unless it's a choice between suicide and a sex-change it will only get worse. And the costs keep coming. You lose control over most aspects of your life, become a second class citizen and all so you can wear women's clothes and feel cuter than you do now. Don't do it is all I've got to say.

    That's advice I wish someone had given me. I had the sex change, I "pass" fine, my career is good but you can't imagine the number of times I've wished I could go back and see if there was another way. Despite following the rules and being as honest as I could with the medical folks at each stage, nobody stopped me and said "Are you honest to God absolutely sure this is the ONLY path for you?!" To the contrary, the voices were all cheerfully supportive of my decision. I was fortunate that the web didn't exist then - there are too damn many cheerleaders ready to reassure themselves of their own decision by parading their "successful" surgeries and encouraging others.

    Contd.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Contd..
    I can speak the transgender party line that I was a female trapped in a male body and I remember feeling this way since I was 4. But, it's never that easy if you look at it sincerely and without preconception. There's little question that a mid-life crisis, a divorce and a cancer scare were involved in at least the timing of my sex-change decision. To be completely honest at this point (3 yrs post-op) is not easy, however, I'm not sure I would do it again. I'm now concerned that much of what I took as a gender dysfunction might have been nothing more than a neurotic sexual obsession. I was a cross-dresser for all of my sexual life and had always fantasized going fem as an ultimate turn-on. Ironically, when I began hormone treatment my libido went away. However, I mistook that relief from sexual obsession for validation of my gender change. Then in the final bit of irony, after surgery my new genitals were non-orgasmic (like 80% of my TG sisters).

    So, needless to say, my life as a woman is not an ultimate turn-on. And what did it all cost? Over $30,000 and the loss of most of my relationships to family and friends. And the costs don't end. Every relationship I make now and in the future has to come to terms with the sex-change. And I'm not the only one who suffers. I hate the impact this will have on my kids and their future.

    Anyway, I'm making it sound awful and it's not. There are some perks but the important things like being comfortable with myself and having a true love in my life don't seem like they were contingent on the change. Being my "real self" could have included having a penis and including more femininity in whatever forms made sense. I didn't know that until too late and now I have to make the best of the life I've stumbled into. I just wish I would have tried more options before I jumped off the precipice. I miss my easy access to my kids (unlike many TS's I didn't completely lose access to them though), I miss my family and old friends (I know they "shouldn't" have abandoned me but lots of folks aren't as open minded as they "should" be ... I still miss them) and finally, I hate the disconnect with my past (there's just no way to integrate the two unrelated lives). There's any number of ways to express your gender and sexuality and the only one I tried was the big one. I'll never know if I could have found a compromise that might have worked a lot better than the "one size fits all" sex-change. Please, check it out yourself before you do likewise."

    What do you have to say on this?

    ReplyDelete
  13. gazal didi....
    this is gauri ...

    i m just now 21 years old when i was 13 that means 8 years i remember i wore my dadi's saree when nobody was at home....since then i have always thinking of getting dressed like female, want to act like feamle,want to walk like female, inshort want to do every thing like female......

    but unfortunately i m sooo afraid of parents that i ahve nevr done evn a proper crossdressing now this is bcoming problem for me....now i constantly think to wearing saree,want to have long hairs like girls,want to wear ornaments...so my focus from study has been off....this is making my parets dissappoint as i was a brilliant student earlier.....i mstil doing engineering but with low pointers......

    my parents love me very very much i m their single child.....so m not afraid of them of telling the fact but m afraid of society which will create pressure on my family......

    whenever i see a girl i think why i m not like her??? or i observe her moves or style or dressing...

    wat do you think wat should i do???

    means wat should be my 1st step plz didi do respond and that to quickly m waiting.....

    my e-mail id is gauri.patel89@yahoo.co.in from ahmedabad

    ReplyDelete
  14. Anonymous1 – Thank you! :)


    Anonymous2 – I know and understand your concern. Actually, a lot of people have similar questions about Bobby Darling. Here is what I think. See, Bollywood is an industry where more than talent, image sells. Bobby has made an image for herself, which is now supporting her livelihood. It is not as much trauma for her any more, as it is about getting the next paycheck.

    Let’s get it straight that she is no ambassador or representative of Gender Dysphoric people. The only reason she gets so much attention is because she has cut herself out to get attention. Her way of being noticed is coming across as a freak. We need not resent her (for she, really, does not represent us) or even pay her any attention. Every human being is a representative of his or her own self. What’s the point in getting frustrated over somebody else’s behaviour thinking that it brings a bad name to US? Come on, we have plenty of other problems to deal with. Let Bobby enjoy her life if this image rocks her boat! :)


    Anonymous3 – Well, I know of other people who have done it, so it is certainly not impossible. It might seem hard at first, but as things progress, you’ll gradually learn to find ways around the problematic areas. For instance, once your breasts start to grow, you can tie them tightly with a cloth so as to make them seem flat once you wear a shirt.


    Anonymous4 – First of all, thanks a ton for all the wonderful compliments. I don’t know what made everything work out so beautifully for me. I guess it must be a mix of all the reasons you have mentioned yourself. Touch wood, I really have been very very fortunate. But I would give the biggest credit to my family, who created the perfect ambience of love and care for me to be able to feel comfortable with myself and the world around.

    All the best with the hormones and further transition! Keep the faith in yourself, and however hard it might be, keep telling yourself – that one day, it will be over. Take care. :)


    Anonymous5 - ??


    Silent lucidity – I haven’t done any research about the various procedures and doctors in India, so I won’t be able to write such details as those other websites you mention. But in my post ‘The Transition Train’, I do mention the doctors I went to, and the experiences I had with them.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi gazal i want to your email id or your contact number 7376606757
      jamesstark08@gmail.com

      Delete
  15. Babal – Sorry about the really late reply. Thanks for the wish. :)


    Anonymous6 – See, a safe way to find such doctors would be to track the most active LGBT NGOs (like Humsafar in Bombay) in your city. These groups would normally always have a list of recommended doctors one can consult. Even if it is just an NGO for gay people, their doctor would most probably be open and friendly towards people with gender issues as well.


    Silent lucidity – Again, sorry. :( I have no knowledge of such a surgeon in particular, but any good and reputed cosmetic surgeon should be able to do the trick.


    Anonymous7 – Please refrain from using abusive language… even against other abusers. Thanks!


    Anonymous8 – Thanks a lot for all your compliments. I post pictures in context of my posts only, and not on request.

    ReplyDelete
  16. CoNfUsEd – What I have to say to this is that she speaks for herself. Her experience has been horrible. I speak for myself too. My experience has been fabulous. There will always be these two extremes – there is no denying that, and yet, I’m more than inclined to believe that Danielle had rushed into the transition for all the wrong reasons, and is now repenting for them. I always advise people to be careful before they jump on to the transition track, especially because sex-change is NOT a “one size fits all” solution, and I have never claimed for it to be. Crossdressers, for instance, do NOT need to change their sex to be happy. They just need to change their clothes!

    Danielle herself says that she was in the middle of a midlife crisis, a divorce and Cancer when she decided to go for a sex change. She does not mention whether she got 3 independent psychiatric evaluations done or not, but even if she did, it is unfortunate that the psychiatrist could not see that it was more of an impact of all the other problems in her life that she tried to find a solution of, in this way.

    Coming to the technical issues she mentions, firstly, genitals being orgasmic or not is in the hands of a surgeon. It’s a pity that even at THAT cost (30,000 USD), she didn’t go to a good enough doctor. I paid 7800 USD in Bangkok, and I have no complaints about my genitals’ orgasmic abilities.

    About every new relationship having to come to terms with the change, hell yes! You obviously KNOW that when you’re stepping into it. And no, things don’t get magically solved after the surgery, they certainly don’t. That’s because the decades of pain behind us has left very deep footprints on our minds and hearts. It takes time to erase those footprints, but there’s no denying that the quality of life increases manifold for most people.

    About the disconnect from the past, that’s a choice an individual makes oneself. I never disconnected from my past. All the people from my past have moved into my present along with me, with the exception of not even a single person. In fact, more and more people from my degree college and my past keep finding out about me from various sources and keep getting back in touch with me.

    I’m not saying Danielle’s pain and her issues are not real. I’m just saying that she does not represent the entire range of post-operative women. Nor do I. All women have different experiences, and yes, like I say, the pain from the past abates only with time, but that said, I certainly believe that more women are happy post-surgery, than they’re sulking.


    Gauri – I know and understand what you’re going through, and it’s really hard, I know. But the good part is that you have a great relationship with your parents. You’re at least confident about telling them. Most people are not able to do that all their lives.

    But even if you’re confident, I think you should go about it slowly. For instance, cursorily mention the medical problem called Gender Identity Disorder. Leave some scientific information around for them to read. Gradually expose them to what you’re dealing with and then come out to them.

    Stop bothering about the society. People will be shocked at first, will pressurize your parents next, and gradually, they’ll move on with their own lives. Why bother about people who don’t even make any difference to your life? I know it is not easy, but think… What is more difficult? Living the way you’re living for 50-60 more years? Or just dealing with people’s reactions for a few days or even months?

    All the best! Take care, and keep the faith.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Hi!Gazal you looking so gorgeous in saree, wearing for photo printed in bombay dost.
    why not you try in film or tv serial or anchoring.
    your voice is so sweet(girlish),is it natural or you carry out any operation for it.
    i guess your voice is natural,can your body language(हाव भाव) also girlish type since childhood.

    all the best!

    ReplyDelete
  18. Could you please tell me whom are you seeing for laser?
    Kaya and Dr.Rekha Seth charge a lot. :-(
    How much are you paying per session?

    ReplyDelete
  19. dear Gazal,
    i am soo impressed with your way of expressing your thoughts.....
    as i requested in another comment...i would be honored to meet you when i visit Mumbai from new york where i teach at a college...I am 50 yrs and struggling with similar issues and you could inspire me on my next steps.....
    PLEASE write to me at my email address, femi_nize@yahoo.com i can meet you anywhere you like but would love to invite you for a nice lunch......my request would be to keep my secrets....many thansk & regards.....

    ReplyDelete
  20. Anonymous9 – Hi! Thanks for the compliment! :)

    My voice is natural, but I know of other women who have practiced and made their voices feminine in their own. And yes, my mannerisms were also always feminine, although it didn’t make my life any easier earlier.

    All the best to you too! :)


    Anonymous10 – I’m seeing Dr. Rekha Sheth and pay her around Rs. 5000 for one facial laser sitting. If I took a package of 5, it would probably come to Rs. 20,000 or a little lesser.

    Yes, I know that’s very expensive and it cuts my pocket everytime I go for a laser sitting, but I didn’t want to take any risk with this, hence, I decided that I’d go to the best.

    ReplyDelete
  21. thanks Gazal,
    you did Not respond to my request to meet in Mumbai, during my visit in May
    i hope u agree. do write back soon as i plan to depart new york next week
    jasmin
    femi_nize@yahoo.com

    ReplyDelete
  22. i am disappointed that u just ignored my request to meet in Mumbai...Even if you did not want to meet you could have at least responded to my request...
    After reading All your blogs and seeing your interviews it becomes obvious that you are quite narcisstic and self absorbed. But of course Any One who causes so much pain to His ( Sorry you might Look like a girl But u r NOT a girl so No her / she for you ) family has to be immensely selfish. And, you are doing the same things that you blame Bobby Darling for...You do it with more class and you do write very well but you are equally publicity hungry....
    But the Biggest and Most disgraceful disservice u r doing to All your readers / listeners is by glorifying a sad and pathetic lifestyle and encouraging them to take the same leap that you did. You are Also such a hypocrite for saying that Orgasm does not matter.....it is well known that over 50 % of M2F do NOT orgasm and doctors lie to make money and those operated lie to save face and justify their disastrous decision. You are dying to be a woman and Orgasm as a woman does Not matter ! Ha, that is so unnatural, and so abnormal...The fact is u have NO choice and U do NOT have the courage to admit that u made a mistake and that Now u r neither a man nor a woman, u r just delusional.
    I pray to God to give you peace....u say u r not sure about God, so why did u go to the gurudwara ?? to get langar ??
    Please stop destroying other lives !
    IT IS OK TO XDRESS SOMETIMES BUT GUYS NRVER EVER HAVE SRS....U R JUST PURSUING A FANTASY....& U WILL BE DISAPPOINTED AND REGRETFUL...U WILL NEVER BECOME A GIRL....ENJOY WHAT GOD GAVE YOU...DON"T GET FOOLED BY MONEY HUNGRY DOCTORS AND GAZALS OF THE WORLD WHO CANNOT ADMIT A MISTAKE !!!. POOR GAZAL, SHE CANNOT ORGASM AS A MAN OR AS A WOMAN...
    jasmin
    femi_nize@yahoo.com





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    ReplyDelete
  23. Please Gazal, Do NOT get married to a man and destroy his happiness because you cannot satisfy him as a girl since you cannot orgasm...And, please stop the BIG lie that Sex is not important to you....taht it is only about gender...don't hide behind language and semantics...just admit it that you are missing the best part of being a girl...and please Stop recommending your doctor...i wonder if you get a Cut from him for all your recommendations!
    please don't take it personally. i do admire you in some ways BUT u r hurting others by Not being honest....SRS does Not make a guy into a girl....It just messes your Body, Mind & Soul !!
    Be Well,
    jasmin
    femi_nize@yahoo.com

    ReplyDelete
  24. i hope Gazal, that you are still up since it is 10 pm in india ( 12 30 pm here in US ) and hope you will Finally respond to my comments, if you have the Balls to be honest...But wait, Oops i forgot that your loving doctor removed them....and you didn't care that it depleted your family's bank account As You Said....
    with love,
    jasmin

    ReplyDelete
  25. I hope Jasmin's spam messages are deleted.

    However, I would like to address some of Jasmin's genuine arguments.

    Gender dysphoria is a personal issue and transition (to whatever extent) is a personal matter too. Gazal or anybody else transitioning is not hurting you or me. So why harass them? It's their life. Let them live it the way they want to.

    Danielle Berry's advice is good. It is good because it highlights the fact that being a woman psychologically has nothing to do with having a vagina. Danielle says that she would have been happier living as female without SRS.

    Her advice is good because it points out that SRS is not always successful in providing orgasms. It is also good because it points out that SRS should not be the end-goal for everyone. Each person's transition is different and should be different. Danielle also points out that there are too many cheerleaders, especially online, who hide the negative aspects of SRS. Danielle's message cautions against undergoing SRS during personal adversities and it also highlights the need to get second opinions and third opinions from psychologists before taking the big step. That's all good advice.

    However, let's stop the prejudice. People undergo gender transition for themselves, to overcome their gender dysphoria, not to please some man. Having sex is not the goal of gender transition. If someone undergoes transition just to have sex or if someone thinks that trans people undergo transition just to have sex, they have got it totally wrong!

    ReplyDelete
  26. Danielle's mistake was to link her sexuality to her gender. She was sexually aroused by the thought of being transformed into a woman and having sex. She was a fetishist (nothing wrong with that) and she chose gender transition and SRS for the wrong reasons. Her warning is apt for the vast majority of transgender people out there, who do not need SRS.

    Gender and sexuality are not the same. Gender transition is not a solution to sexual orientation issues. If you are a genetic male and want to have sex with a man, go have sex with a man, but you are not transgender! You are gay; you don't have gender dysphoria. Gender transition must be done if and only if you have gender dysphoria.

    To decide if you have gender dysphoria or a sexual fetish towards being a woman, ask yourself the question -
    "If I can never have sex again as male or as female, what gender would I chose to live as?"

    If your answer is the gender opposite to the gender assigned at birth, then you probably have gender dysphoria, assuming you are mentally sane and not undergoing adversities in life. You must delink gender dysphoria from sexuality to learn what is right for you.

    In addition, most genetic women are unable to orgasm. Most fake orgasms. Does that make the man's experience less pleasurable? No. Why is pleasing a man your criterion? You are right that a significant ratio of transwoman after SRS cannot have orgasms, or at least cannot have orgasms the same way as they had imagined. However, a transwoman unable to orgasm after SRS is nothing out of the ordinary for women.

    Women are human beings. Giving pleasure to a man is not their sole purpose in life. If you think that the only purpose of a transwoman undergoing transition and SRS is to be sexually objectified by a man, go get a life!

    If a transwoman's gender dysphoria includes her genitals, then SRS is a perfectly valid treatment for her gender dysphoria. If her gender dysphoria does not include her genitals, she must not venture into SRS. That's the focus of Danielle's message. Using that message to attack Gazal, whose gender dysphoria may have included her genitals (you and I are not the judges of that), is inappropriate.

    In addition, Gazal is an ambassador of the trans community, highlighting the fact that trans people can be normal human beings, not prostitutes or beggars as our society seems to believe. The publicity she gets is going towards a positive cause. So refrain from your unnecessary insults.

    ReplyDelete
  27. sorry but you have many mis statements..who said a woman should orgasm to satisfy a man....A woman needs to orgasm to satisfy herself and it is essentila to orgasm to lead a normal and happy life...also many genetic woman may not Orgasm through penetration but almost ALL orgasm through Clitirol stimulation and masturbation and oral sex BUT Gazal and other trans girls cannot orgasm at all....they are marketed a false fantasy and then they become cheer leaders for others..it is that i strongly object to about Gazal...If she is honest and Not publicity hungry, she should be warning others NOT to transition. She herself admits that she went through SRS in a hurry.....
    We need to prevent SRS and find other solutions NOT encourage them....That cheerleading is cruel and vicious and dishonest....Gazal is too smart not to know it....

    ReplyDelete
  28. Gazal can do what she likes in her life...that is her life BUT she should NOT glamorize this pathetic life style go on TV defending it and NOT encourage others to go through SRS at all or promote her doctor - unless she is getting a commission....she also lies about Not being able to orgasm...she pretends that her life post op is perfect and glamorous and it is NOT...how can life for a woman be perfect if she cannot Orgasm - for herself and Not for any man - if someone is born intersex that is different but to take what God has given us and to mutilate it is totally immoral and disgusting.......

    ReplyDelete
  29. why does Gazal Not have the 'balls' to respond to me instead of asking her friends to do it....because deep in her heart she knows that what she did should Not be encouraged....getting 3 opinions is meaningless because most therapists in this field will recommend SRS because i am sure they get a commission from the doctors or they are messed up themselves.....Gazal has a Money & Publicity angle to her story so she has to pretend that life for her post op is perfect...what a shameful lie....She is ruining other lives....
    jasmin

    ReplyDelete
  30. H E L L O !!!!!!!
    Gazal, Where R U, Bitch ??????? Why Don't You Have The Balls To Respond !!!!!!
    BTW, Gazal, SRS is a Misnomer, A Fake Deceptive term used to seduce guys to become girls BUT NO GUY CAN EVER BECOME A GIRL....He Can Have His Penis & Balls Cut off But He can NEVER Be a Girl....SRS should be called PRS - PENIS REMOVAL SURGERY....It Does NOT reassign Sex or Gender....It just Mutilates and cuts off and Butchers your Manhood, like a holy Cow or Goat in the slaughterhouse ...that is NOT the same as becoming a girl...As i have Noted many times by now, these SO CALLED Girls cannot Orgasm and Do Not have a VAGINA...they ONly have a Gaping HOLE where they once had the GOD GIVEN PENIS !!!
    To have a Vagina is TO ORGASM!!
    SO PLEASE YOU CREEPY GUYS & GREEDY DOCTORS STOP calling it SRS and instead call it for what it is PRS !!!!!!!!!!
    So U BITCH GAZAL, Come Forward & Respond OR STOP Promoting this lifestyle and InHumane, Barbarious, dangerous, IMMMORAL BUTCHERING OF MALENESS...
    If NOT, We Will SUE you for Ruining other lives !!!!!! Do U have the Resources to Fight a lawsuit !!! Also, if any compensation has been paid by your doctor for promoting him, it will come to life and Be Exposed.......
    Don't Be A Hypocrite!!!
    with love,
    jasmin

    ReplyDelete
  31. Respond To Me U Gazal BITCH !

    ReplyDelete
  32. BTW Gazal BITCH, Don't Be So Frustated Just because u cannot orgasm, Go Ahead Get Fucked In The Ass....You might get more of an Orgasm from Anal Sex than u would EVER from the So Called Vagina Sex....BUT OF COURSE U DID NOT have to Butcher your Penis to have Anal Sex.......Your Anus was always there 2 B penetrated by a real Penis OR by a Strap On.....

    Get An Attorney BITCH U will need one Soon !!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  33. http://www.mumbaimirror.com/article/2/2010043020100430030503388d67c58d8/Counting-Billions.html

    Read this article!Bloody Ignorant Indians!

    ReplyDelete
  34. To femi_nize@yahoo.com , whay are you using My name ( jasmin) in gazalhopes.blogspot.com ?? YOU shit ?? i fuck you basted femi_nize@yahoo.com ??

    ReplyDelete
  35. Ghazal you are an incredible woman. I respect you so, so, so much for your strength. I love the faith you have in God; I simply adore your family, I think it is incredible that you are so multi-talented – you are artistically inclined; you did engineering. You have a face of an angel and such a melodious voice. You are God’s very special child. I pray that you get all you want in life. And I know you will. This is for you little angel. It is by Rascal Flatts the music band. It is a song called My Wish. As you are a lyricist you may like the words. God bless you.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xz32I_GbpeU

    ReplyDelete
  36. A Concerned ReaderJuly 12, 2010 at 3:03 PM

    Um it appears that you are getting spammed like anything. I do not know what your policy regarding comments is, but it would be advisable for you to delete some of the comments above. They distract from the main purpose of your blog, and they are a blood boiler in general. (Ahem. Excuse me?)

    You could always turn on moderation, but that might became a pain in the behind in the longer run.

    Anyway, I am wondering if there is any way for me to contact you discretely off a public forum like this.

    ReplyDelete
  37. Jay / Jasmin – I fail to understand what made you so desperate for my response. Here’s one thing you might like to know about me, for future reference, for your own benefit – I do not care about abuses and remarks like the ones you have made because they reek with a sense of desperation and spite. I appreciate, welcome and enjoy constructive criticism and healthy debate, but what you’re doing here is merely a parody of your own insecurities. And really, I couldn’t care less.

    As regards your random assumption about my genitals, I have said everything I want to say about it on this blog, already. I’d ask the other readers to read my posts and other comments.

    And lastly, you claimed to be a 50-year-old professor in New York city?! Please deal with your own bag of lies before you accuse other people of being liars.


    Ria – Excellent observations! And thanks for being the only person who stood up for me. :)


    Shemalejasmin – I again request you to not spam my blog and avoid using abusive language. It just puts the readers off and serves no purpose. I hope you would pay heed to my request this time.


    Anonymous11 – Thank you so very much for such a heartwarming message. I liked the song. Thanks for that too! Wish you all the best! :)


    Concerned Reader – I know… the spam comments are quite a pain, but then, I want to keep the commenting moderation-free. Let’s just say I believe in freedom of expression [as long as it is, at least, written coherently]. :)

    Regarding contacting me discreetly, I’m afraid I generally do not entertain that. What is it about, if I could ask?

    ReplyDelete
  38. Hey Gazal,

    I dont know what i was doing for so many days i happened to read the comments today.. I really very disheartened that your beautiful blog has received such comments.. but again its U simply U who managed to keep these comments.. nothing else can speak better than your actions.. Everyone who will read your blog will know whats the truth..and respect you more!!!

    I would say " ye ek chotasa kaala tikaa hai.. abhi aapke blog ko aur aapko kisi ki nazar nahi lagegi.."

    Take Care.. Lots Of Love n Respect..!!!

    ReplyDelete
  39. dear gazal,
    wishing u a happy friendship day,
    today i am very depressed as i am not able to make any friends,since childhood i had been so lonely,my classmates didn't talk to me because they were suspicious that i was gay or transgender and hence no liked talking and you don't believe they don't even like sitting with me.i am so alone in entire world ,every body made fun of me,i tried my best to show all my activities like boys but still i cannot walk like boys.
    i feel that the world is really an ugly place.
    today i've no friends and i am suffering from depression ,i have gone bad in studies.
    what should be done,what is my future are the questions that surround my mind.
    if i go for sex change,will i get that value that a women gets or will any boy would really love me.will my marriage be successfull.
    sometimes i feel that i should committ suicide.
    i tried my best to focus on my studies yet failed to concentrate.
    i am crying tears of blood,
    can u help me.
    life.less.than.normal@gmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  40. dear gazal,
    i'm waiting for your reply.
    how do you study when you were trapped in a wrong body,please tell me,i'm going very bad in my studies,as i'm not able to concentrate.
    plese help me.
    life.less.than.normal@gmail.com.
    take care.

    ReplyDelete
  41. Just a small suggestion that may help: there are blogs that when a person keys in their comment, it does not automatically appear. Only when the blog owner sees it, and approves of it, will it appear. Can you work out something like that. Unfortunately there will always be people who wish to make comments that are inappropriate. I see this as the only way to prevent cyberbullies from defacing this site. Unfortunately I share the same nickname as J/Jasmine. So I'm pretty concerned.

    ReplyDelete
  42. dear gazal,
    please response to my blog.you are a source of inspiration for me.
    life.less.than.normal@gmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  43. Hi Gazal
    With your permission may I, in your comments section, put in the names of some sites and blogs that would help tranpeople in their journey? I want to ask you first as it is rude to put up other site addresses on a bloggers blog. I can promise you they are helpful sites. Also Susans.org is looking for writers! I like your clear style of writing and feel you could reach so many more people through the forum if you are not on it already.
    thank you

    ReplyDelete
  44. dear gazal,
    sometimes i feel ,is god really there.
    life.less.than.normal@gmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  45. A Concerned ReaderAugust 14, 2010 at 12:20 PM

    I can understand that. You know, you could always implement something like disqus and down vote the spam comments, or port your blog over to wordpress which is quite awesome with stuff like this.

    It's something really straight forward to do, and it just pains me to see you cramped by trolls who have nothing better to do.

    I wanted to talk to you because I am a trans teen and I just wanted to talk to someone. I know it sounds so quixotic, but it's true. I hope that you understand.

    Take care.

    ReplyDelete
  46. hi gazal howz u nd life going gazal main ap se pochna hain ke do tansexual male to female have the feelig of sex and get pleasure and give the feelng to the male patner? kya male to female ko masterbution hoti hai? yae ek system hota hain jo male body part maain hota hain yani sperm ka relase hona hain apni ap ? kya opertion he bat ye system rahta hain ya nhi ? kya male to female apna milk pila sakti hai baby ko asa system hota hain ? kya opertion ke bat is all same like femal body part and feel natural ? is there is any problm in marriage and sex life ? mujhe in sub savaloo ke ans cahye gazal plz app ka intazar rahe ga app ke dost babal take care alot

    ReplyDelete
  47. http://gidinteralia.blogspot.com/

    Could you please read the post titled My Transition on this blog and tell me what you think about it?

    I know it is painfully long but it really MADE ME THINK. So, if you have time, please tell me what you think about it.

    ReplyDelete
  48. hey gazal ....its been a month stillu didnt post anything...waiting for ur posts

    ReplyDelete
  49. watz your european shoe size?if more than 41, how do you find female shoes?

    ReplyDelete
  50. hye dear gazal how are u ? mere saval hain ke kiya operation ke bat male to female body change is same and look and feel like natural women ? kiya mian india main aker rahkar wah apne is process ko start kar sakti hon ? gazal if i love some one kiya mujhe use patana cahe about my love and problm app he patye main kaiy bat pahle bato? aur kase becoz mujhe apne dost ko nahe khona gazal do u think that i am a true transexul nd i need to cahnge my sex ?kiya lagata hain appko mere savaloo se keu k mujhe bachpan se girls toy and stuff attrack karty thay and i plays with all this ind of think in my childhooh main bhoth paresahan aur dukh takleef main ho asa gum god kise ko na daye well tc ok bye plz ans me i am waiting urs babal

    ReplyDelete
  51. sorry for those all the guys who love gazal very much. she is married and living with her husbend.

    ReplyDelete
  52. Guess you are really busy these days.:(

    ReplyDelete
  53. Hi GAZAL
    from the day i saw your story in THE WEEK magazine i have been thinking to get in touch. I don't know what stopped me.I am 26 years old and about 5 years ago while reading an article in THE HINDU newspaper i came to know that i may be suffering from klinefelter's syndrome. Before that people especially friends used to make fun of me due to my physical appearance.As i was not aware of such a syndrome 10 years ago i began to go to gym to shape my body.soon i found out that is in vain. After reading the HINDU i kind of like become sad and began to keep this to myself. My life has become kind of miserable now.Until i was 17 my studies went good after that my degree studies went south wards.After reading your story in THE WEEK i thought may be you could give me some advice.i have been following your blog for sometime now, but just couldn't gather the courage to seek your help. please reply me if u can mail me to klinefelterz@gmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  54. How does M2f libido change on HRT and after SRS?

    ReplyDelete
  55. Anonymous12 – Awww… That’s so sweet of you! Thank you so much for giving me a new perspective on those comments – ‘kaala tikaa’ is truly innovative! :)


    Life less than normal – First and foremost, you MUST stop looking at yourself as ‘less than normal’. Until and unless you love yourself, how can you expect someone else to love you?

    See, I can sense a lot of depression from your words, and I can completely understand it, since I have also been clinically depressed in the past. Please try and see a psychiatrist / psychologist, to deal with it. Being positive in your mind is very important for you to be able to do anything positive in your life. I suggest that you draw a time plan on paper. That means – plan your life out, on paper. Write down that by so-and-so time, you would have accomplished such-and-such thing. Just for example, say, by 2012, you would have a job. You would work really hard and make sure that you save enough money, so that by 2013, you can start your transition process.

    It is very important that you tell yourself repeatedly every day that things WILL get better. Right now, the world might seem like a dark space, but if you make a plan and work hard to fulfil it, things will slowly start to look up. Nothing will happen overnight, but with sustained effort and belief in yourself, you can move mountains. Just never give up hope. When you feel down, look at examples of other people who have also been through this and are now living happily. Your time will come too. Just don’t lose hope and the drive. Also, trust me when I say that you have it in you to fight and be victorious. Don’t give up on yourself. All the help you need is there right within you! Search for it!

    Take care. Big hug! Lots of love.


    Anonymous13 – Don’t worry about having the same cyber name. I don’t discriminate on the basis of names (or otherwise). :) I have considered that option in the past, but again, that is SCREENING, and I want my blog to have absolute freedom of expression. I know it can get annoying. I too get annoyed, but as of now, I think I’m okay with this little bit of trouble. I’d like my commenters to feel that what they said has been registered right away. Thanks for the concern though, and once again, please don’t worry about the name. :)


    Anonymous14 – Oh please, please feel free to post the sites’ addresses. It’ll make me aware too. And then, may be, the ones I find useful, I could put them up as a separate post on my blog. Regarding the Susans.org, I’m not too keen on writing elsewhere. I’m happy with this space of my own. Thanks for the suggestion though! I really appreciate it. :)


    Concerned Reader – I’ve been thinking of moving to Wordpress myself. Hopefully, I’ll do it soon.

    I know and understand the need to speak to someone. At the same time, however, I like to draw a line somewhere. However, if you’re in Bombay, you should come to the Sampoorna group meetings, and you’ll have lots of people to talk to, there.

    Take care… and once again, thanks for being so concerned. :)


    Babal – Ek transsexual female bilkul kisi bhi aur female ki tarah sex kar sakti hai, aur apne male partner ko pleasure bhi de sakti hai aur khud ko bhi. Lekin pehle ki tarah sperm ejaculation nahin hota. Uske alaawa, ek transsexual female ko baby nahin ho sakta, isliye milk bhi nahin hota.

    Babal, tumhe ek psychiatrist ko mil kar unse certificate lena chahiye ki tum true transsexual ho ya nahin. Jahaan tak love ka sawaal hai, mujhe lagta hai ki tumhe love ke baare mein tab hi sochna chahiye, jab tum sure ho ki tumhe transition karna hai ya nahin.

    I hope tum achhi ho Babal. Take care.

    ReplyDelete
  56. Anonymous15 – So, I’ve spent a really long time, reading, what you rightfully call, a painfully long post. I must say it was quite insightful, and felt like a genuine story.

    Now, my take on it is this. He made a certain choice… that choice was to accept and live with his GID. He spent 2-3 years analysing his feelings and coming to the conclusion that living as a man would be marginally better than living as a transsexual female [in his case]. Now, if that is what he concluded for himself, who can question it? He has every right to do it, especially since he says that he feels at peace with himself. Now, that’s what is critical. If one is at peace with one’s decision, that is what matters. Had I not transitioned, I know that I would never have been at peace with myself. For all you know, if the writer of that post had also transitioned fully, he might have been able to find peace for himself too. But that is only conjecture now. What we know is that he de-transitioned after much analysis of his own feelings and as a mature thinking individual and I respect that about him.


    Siva – I’m sorry I haven’t been posting and responding regularly. Just been preoccupied a lot.


    Anonymous16 – My shoe size is 42, but some rare 41s fit me too. I do have a hard time finding shoes, especially pretty ones, but somehow or the other, I make do with what I get. :)


    Anonymous17 – That’s news to me!


    Anonymous18 – Yes, I have been. Sorry! :(


    Klinefelterz – I’m sorry for being late in responding to you. I was not aware about this syndrome, and read up a little about it just now. I can only imagine how depressing it must have been to read that article, but hey! Have you like got yourself medically examined? Please don’t assume anything without getting the facts in place, alright?

    For now, I’m going to assume that you would have taken care of the medical examination, and all the medical treatments possible. You know, we make such a big deal out of being ‘normal’. The whole world does. But you know, nobody is normal. Everybody has one or another variation from what is considered ‘normal’. That is what makes us all different and special. I may have undergone a sex change, but I will never have the perfect hourglass shape, but that’s alright. I have learnt to love myself and feel proud of myself. Earlier, when I used to get depressed, I would shut my eyes and mumble to myself, repeatedly – “Even though I was not born a woman, I still deeply and completely love and accept myself”. Every time I would say that, I tried to really believe it and sent all the love I had to myself. It helped. It still helps, when I feel down, sometimes. Try it!

    I don’t know how serious your syndrome is, so I don’t know the impact of it… I do know that there are millions of encouraging stories in the world, who I also look up to when I need encouragement. People have suffered so much and yet come out, bright and smiling. We can do it too, you know! :)

    Big hug. Take care…


    Anonymous19 – The libido reduces significantly, but it’s not that it goes away.

    ReplyDelete
  57. gazal kiya sex change male to female ka virginaty rahti hai ? ya maloom hota hain like the other females

    ReplyDelete
  58. like in sex first time pain hona and blood ka ana this kind of thing ? asa hota hain what dotor say?

    ReplyDelete
  59. like in first time in sex pain and blood ka ana ya hona kiya asa kuch rath hain opertion ke bat female to male ke bat what doctor say?

    ReplyDelete
  60. 'life less than normal" now "god precious gift",
    i've no friends because me as transgender and my activities are not masculine,i'm feeling very lonely.please suggest me what to do,how can i amke friends.

    ReplyDelete
  61. Hey Gazal,

    Its been almost year no post on your blog.. write something..even if not related to GID or other trans issues.. I am sure there must have been some experiences in the past one year which would have had some impact on your life.. good bad happy sad share here.. would love to read them as always..!

    And hey few things i would like to know to be open to the world like you did is a good thing or getting ahead with the transition and shifting to a place where no one knows you is a better thing to do? Will people be as nice to all other people as well..?
    Your family did had to answer questions from other people and what did they answer?
    You have also shifted from your city to mumbai..so do we have to shift to another place??

    ReplyDelete
  62. Uhmm...I recently heard you are between 5'9" and 5'10"..you look hardly 5'7" to me! :D

    Don't you feel odd sometimes because most Indian women are below 5'4"?:(

    Well..where do you find long jeans?

    and check this out...

    http://www.bigshoebazaar.com/search.aspx?id=0,163,0,167,504&pageNum=1&index=0

    They seem to have some (not so!) pretty shoes in your size. :)

    Anonymous 16

    ReplyDelete
  63. Hi,
    I am currently mumbai and would like to get in touch with you(mostly for therapist recommendation). Can you let me know how i can contact you? I got your blog link from rashmi. you can reach me at my blog. http://fictionalautobiography.wordpress.com/

    ReplyDelete
  64. Oh I just had a bad experience with bigshoebazaar.com

    their size 42 turned out to be size 40! lol

    they sent me US 8 instead of UK/Indian 8!

    + the shoes turned out to be fake..

    Sorry, I suggested them to you.

    Anonymous 16

    ReplyDelete
  65. Hi gazal the transexul is realy a (namard)?thats why need to change sex look happy and normal but become in female body and happy but cant not birth a baby callig (banch)y?only for USE just in sex role for a just sex machine FUN AND ETC

    ReplyDelete
  66. did u start taking antiandrogens in ur teens? or few months before u started HRT?

    ReplyDelete
  67. do you know any Indian trans-person who has moved to UK or US? if yes, can you tell me about their experience? do u think it is safer to transition in India and THEN move to US/UK? would being "trans" and "Indian" make things worse for a trans-person residing out of India?

    ReplyDelete
  68. Gazal, Its almost an year since you posted your blog... which was one thing I was always looking for... to get inspiration... and motivation... I don't know... may be you are busy... or busier than ever you were... but please please please... We want to know more about post-op life... and your little happiness...that used to give us little hope... Please start posting this year...Please...

    ReplyDelete
  69. Happpy B'day! :D

    ReplyDelete
  70. Anonymous20 – First-time pain of course happens. But I’m not sure about the blood. In genetic women, there is bleeding because of the hymen breaking, but there is no hymen created through surgery, so I guess it doesn’t happen.


    Anonymous21 / god precious gift – You have to be your own friend first. You must value yourself as a person before anyone else can begin to do that. I know it’s easier said than done. And yet, you must keep working on it. Tell yourself every morning you wake up that you’re a precious person and that a beautiful life is waiting for you ahead of you. Don’t be desperate for friends. Find joy in your own life. Read, watch fun things, do fun things on your own. When people realize that you’re a fun person and not a clinger, they would automatically want to know you and be friends with you. Keep trying, alright? And take care.


    Klinefelterz – You’re welcome.


    Anonymous22 – Somehow, I’m just not being able to get myself motivated to write on the blog. It feels like I have exhausted all topics, but I’ll definitely try to write something soon. Thanks for following my blog.

    Regarding your questions, see, whether to be open to the world or not is a very personal choice that you’ll have to make for yourself. Being discreet of course has it plusses. I, however, chose to keep it otherwise because it just felt right to do it. I had taken guidance from so many people. It just felt like a good way to repay the world. I shifted my city not because of transition or anything, but because I always wanted to work in Bombay. My parents did have to answer questions and they did it rather well, I’d say. I’m proud of them for that, but yes, if you want to save your parents from having to do that, then you might want to go the closet way. It’s totally your pick and both the choices are equally valid. All the best! Take care.


    Anonymous16 – I am 5’9”. I actually feel quite cool about my height, particularly because most women around are so short. :) Jeans are usually not an issue, since they’re the perfect length for me. Shoes, yes, are a big big trouble. :( [Oops! About that bad experience with that website!]


    Anonymous23 – Hi! I’m sorry but I do not personally meet people to give guidance. I try and provide whatever help I can through this blog. What therapy are you looking at? Psychological or Hormones etc?


    Anonymous24 – Being a transperson is much more than being a Sex toy. It’s about identity and love for oneself. But I see no point in getting into this explanation for you!


    Anonymous25 – I started taking anti-androgens a few months before my surgery, the same time when I started the rest of the hormones.


    Anonymous26 – I’m afraid I know of nobody like that, but if I were you, I would want to transition in India and then, move to the new place with the new identity. It would be perfect, actually. All the best! Take care.


    Anonymous27 – I understand and am thankful to you for looking forward to my posts. I’ll definitely try to post something soon. Take care.


    Anonymous 28 – Thank you! :)

    ReplyDelete
  71. Section377 ( Side Effectts of Legalizing GAYSEX Will Destroy Social Fabric in INDIA )
    Huge Financial Corruption in MsmCBO or NGO in INDIA Encourages by NACO and others ?
    Hjiras,Gandu’s,MsM,Kinar,Aravanies,6no’s,Mamu & Dogs Not Allowed ??

    Blogger :- http://section377india.blogspot.com/
    Youtube :- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x9I0NrOkaDQ
    Wordpress :- http://shemalejasmin.wordpress.com/
    YahooGroups :- http://groups.yahoo.com/group/section377india
    jasminshemalehyd@gmail.com
    jasmin_shemale@yahoo.com
    section377india@gmail.com

    Section377 > GAY Get FUCKED on Roads freely ?
    Section377> HEJADS do CRIMAL ACTIVETES freely ?
    Section377 > HEJADS do SEXWORK on Roads freely ?
    Section377 > GAY & HEJADS and MsM,s Terrible ?
    Section377 > No Opinion HEJADS are Crimals of Society ?
    Section377 > Hjiras & Dogs Not Allowed ?
    Section377 > MsM have 89% are AIDS Check MSM CBO in INDIA ?
    Section377 > Hijads have 89% are AIDS Check MSM CBO in INDIIA ?
    Section377 > MSM CBO & NGO have a PLHA centers ?
    Section377 > GAYSEX will Destroy Social Fabric in INDIA ?

    ReplyDelete
  72. 12
    Section377 ( Side Effectts of Legalizing GAYSEX Will Destroy Social Fabric in INDIA )
    Huge Financial Corruption in MsmCBO or NGO in INDIA Encourages by NACO and others ?
    Hjiras,Gandu’s,MsM,Kinar,Aravanies,6no’s,Mamu & Dogs Not Allowed ??

    Blogger :- http://section377india.blogspot.com/
    Youtube :- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x9I0NrOkaDQ
    Wordpress :- http://shemalejasmin.wordpress.com/
    YahooGroups :- http://groups.yahoo.com/group/section377india
    jasminshemalehyd@gmail.com
    jasmin_shemale@yahoo.com
    section377india@gmail.com

    Section377 > GAY Get FUCKED on Roads freely ?
    Section377> HEJADS do CRIMAL ACTIVETES freely ?
    Section377 > HEJADS do SEXWORK on Roads freely ?
    Section377 > GAY & HEJADS and MsM,s Terrible ?
    Section377 > No Opinion HEJADS are Crimals of Society ?
    Section377 > Hjiras & Dogs Not Allowed ?
    Section377 > MsM have 89% are AIDS Check MSM CBO in INDIA ?
    Section377 > Hijads have 89% are AIDS Check MSM CBO in INDIIA ?
    Section377 > MSM CBO & NGO have a PLHA centers ?
    Section377 > GAYSEX will Destroy Social Fabric in INDIA ?

    ReplyDelete
  73. 34
    Section377 ( Side Effectts of Legalizing GAYSEX Will Destroy Social Fabric in INDIA )
    Huge Financial Corruption in MsmCBO or NGO in INDIA Encourages by NACO and others ?
    Hjiras,Gandu’s,MsM,Kinar,Aravanies,6no’s,Mamu & Dogs Not Allowed ??

    Blogger :- http://section377india.blogspot.com/
    Youtube :- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x9I0NrOkaDQ
    Wordpress :- http://shemalejasmin.wordpress.com/
    YahooGroups :- http://groups.yahoo.com/group/section377india
    jasminshemalehyd@gmail.com
    jasmin_shemale@yahoo.com
    section377india@gmail.com

    Section377 > GAY Get FUCKED on Roads freely ?
    Section377> HEJADS do CRIMAL ACTIVETES freely ?
    Section377 > HEJADS do SEXWORK on Roads freely ?
    Section377 > GAY & HEJADS and MsM,s Terrible ?
    Section377 > No Opinion HEJADS are Crimals of Society ?
    Section377 > Hjiras & Dogs Not Allowed ?
    Section377 > MsM have 89% are AIDS Check MSM CBO in INDIA ?
    Section377 > Hijads have 89% are AIDS Check MSM CBO in INDIIA ?
    Section377 > MSM CBO & NGO have a PLHA centers ?
    Section377 > GAYSEX will Destroy Social Fabric in INDIA ?

    ReplyDelete
  74. 56
    Section377 ( Side Effectts of Legalizing GAYSEX Will Destroy Social Fabric in INDIA )
    Huge Financial Corruption in MsmCBO or NGO in INDIA Encourages by NACO and others ?
    Hjiras,Gandu’s,MsM,Kinar,Aravanies,6no’s,Mamu & Dogs Not Allowed ??

    Blogger :- http://section377india.blogspot.com/
    Youtube :- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x9I0NrOkaDQ
    Wordpress :- http://shemalejasmin.wordpress.com/
    YahooGroups :- http://groups.yahoo.com/group/section377india
    jasminshemalehyd@gmail.com
    jasmin_shemale@yahoo.com
    section377india@gmail.com

    Section377 > GAY Get FUCKED on Roads freely ?
    Section377> HEJADS do CRIMAL ACTIVETES freely ?
    Section377 > HEJADS do SEXWORK on Roads freely ?
    Section377 > GAY & HEJADS and MsM,s Terrible ?
    Section377 > No Opinion HEJADS are Crimals of Society ?
    Section377 > Hjiras & Dogs Not Allowed ?
    Section377 > MsM have 89% are AIDS Check MSM CBO in INDIA ?
    Section377 > Hijads have 89% are AIDS Check MSM CBO in INDIIA ?
    Section377 > MSM CBO & NGO have a PLHA centers ?
    Section377 > GAYSEX will Destroy Social Fabric in INDIA ?

    ReplyDelete
  75. 78
    Section377 ( Side Effectts of Legalizing GAYSEX Will Destroy Social Fabric in INDIA )
    Huge Financial Corruption in MsmCBO or NGO in INDIA Encourages by NACO and others ?
    Hjiras,Gandu’s,MsM,Kinar,Aravanies,6no’s,Mamu & Dogs Not Allowed ??

    Blogger :- http://section377india.blogspot.com/
    Youtube :- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x9I0NrOkaDQ
    Wordpress :- http://shemalejasmin.wordpress.com/
    YahooGroups :- http://groups.yahoo.com/group/section377india
    jasminshemalehyd@gmail.com
    jasmin_shemale@yahoo.com
    section377india@gmail.com

    Section377 > GAY Get FUCKED on Roads freely ?
    Section377> HEJADS do CRIMAL ACTIVETES freely ?
    Section377 > HEJADS do SEXWORK on Roads freely ?
    Section377 > GAY & HEJADS and MsM,s Terrible ?
    Section377 > No Opinion HEJADS are Crimals of Society ?
    Section377 > Hjiras & Dogs Not Allowed ?
    Section377 > MsM have 89% are AIDS Check MSM CBO in INDIA ?
    Section377 > Hijads have 89% are AIDS Check MSM CBO in INDIIA ?
    Section377 > MSM CBO & NGO have a PLHA centers ?
    Section377 > GAYSEX will Destroy Social Fabric in INDIA ?

    ReplyDelete
  76. 90
    Section377 ( Side Effectts of Legalizing GAYSEX Will Destroy Social Fabric in INDIA )
    Huge Financial Corruption in MsmCBO or NGO in INDIA Encourages by NACO and others ?
    Hjiras,Gandu’s,MsM,Kinar,Aravanies,6no’s,Mamu & Dogs Not Allowed ??

    Blogger :- http://section377india.blogspot.com/
    Youtube :- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x9I0NrOkaDQ
    Wordpress :- http://shemalejasmin.wordpress.com/
    YahooGroups :- http://groups.yahoo.com/group/section377india
    jasminshemalehyd@gmail.com
    jasmin_shemale@yahoo.com
    section377india@gmail.com

    Section377 > GAY Get FUCKED on Roads freely ?
    Section377> HEJADS do CRIMAL ACTIVETES freely ?
    Section377 > HEJADS do SEXWORK on Roads freely ?
    Section377 > GAY & HEJADS and MsM,s Terrible ?
    Section377 > No Opinion HEJADS are Crimals of Society ?
    Section377 > Hjiras & Dogs Not Allowed ?
    Section377 > MsM have 89% are AIDS Check MSM CBO in INDIA ?
    Section377 > Hijads have 89% are AIDS Check MSM CBO in INDIIA ?
    Section377 > MSM CBO & NGO have a PLHA centers ?
    Section377 > GAYSEX will Destroy Social Fabric in INDIA ?

    ReplyDelete
  77. hi gazal,my doc started me on aldactone and premarin.could u tell me wht did ur doc prescribe and after srs do we still need aldactone and if yes why.also after srs what dosage they generally prescribe .plz explain thanks

    ReplyDelete
  78. dear gazal,i am a nurse and my spouse is a transgender woman.though i know a little but here in nepal not many doctors treated trans ppl before.kindly explain the dosage of hormones both pre and post op with their names as our doctor himself doesn't know much abt it and it would be a great help.i went thru ur blog but it was not clear there.also if any good surgeon in india plz let us know.thanks.doma

    ReplyDelete
  79. MALE to FEMALe harmones Info log INNN

    SheMaleJasmin Website
    http://users3.jabry.com/shemalejasmin150m/

    ReplyDelete
  80. dear gazal,i would like to ask some questions please help me.
    q1] how did you studied,as for me i'm not able to concentrate and therefore my studies are getting affected,also nobody interacts with me therefore life has been a hell.
    please suggest me method so that i can perform well.
    from :god's beautiful gift.

    q2] how can i make friends,as nobody is interested in talking me.when i see people having a great timepass with their friends,i hate god for miking me transgender.

    q3]there are few classmates who have a softcorner for me,since there is nobody with whom i can disclose the secret that i'm transgender,should i tell them about me,may be they can help me,but somewhere i fear that might not disfame me or make fun of me.

    q4]i have lost my belief in god,for making me transgender,how could i get over it.

    q5]i am lagging in my studies,i can i concentrate on my studies.

    q6]i have controlled all my voluntary activities,so that i may not look like gay or tg but still i walk i girls and some actions,how could i make it.

    please answer to all my queries your one step can change a life.
    all the best!

    ReplyDelete
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    ReplyDelete
  82. hey ghazal didi how r u?? my name is zysha and i am from paikstan. i would be 21 on 29th of july 2011. i am a transgender. since my childhood i always wanted to be a girl. my life was also full of labels and tags. sometimes i labeled my self as a shemale and some times a gay. but i was very clear that i am not a boy. well today i am confident about my self and i knw that i am a woman. because my soul is of a girl. though my body is 100% of a boy but my soul is of a girl. and u knw how pathetic it is to live a fake life. so now i hav decided to hav a srs.
    well i am really thankful to u 4 making this wonderful and informational blog it has helped me alot in clearing many of the concepts.

    well coming to the point. these days i am having sessions with my psychologist. my last session with her was pathetic as i felt that she was unable to understand me. in pakistan there are no experts who know about GID properly. so its my delima. she says that we psychologists focus on the history of any problem, according to her she says that may be in my childhood there might have been some incidents due to which i had developed a mental approach of a girl. but i dont agree to her because GID is from the time of the birth. and the only solution to GID is a sex change operation. but she is not understanding it. she says that she would try to give me therapies and change my feelings into those like a boy and make me a heterosexual. but i knw that i cant be a boy. i would prefer to die but i wont live this pathetic life of a boy.
    i know i would be in peace in a girl's body. so please tell me how can i convince my psychologist? and is there any treatment other than SRS for the GID as my psychologist believes. ???/

    ReplyDelete
  83. MALE to FEMALe harmones Info log INNN
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    ReplyDelete
  84. Hey! Please help me with the following questions.

    1. Dr. Rekha Seth has two clinics in Mumbai-one in Vile Parle and one in Marine Lines. Which one did/do you go to? I'm asking you this question because they have LightSheer Diode in Marine Lines and CoolGlide in Vile Parle. I had a patch test with LightSheer Diode somewhere and got burnt. :(

    2. Did you tell the technician/doctor there you are transsexual?

    3. Are they experienced in treating the beard area on transsexuals or men?

    4. Can you tell me what settings(joules, pulse width and spot size) were used on you initially? And what settings are being used now?

    5. How were your sessions spaced out initially? There are mixed answers to this question on the internet and from doctors. Some say once a month initially is the most effective frequency and some say 6-8 weeks.

    6. Do you experience complete(or almost complete) shedding after every session? I talked to people from Dr. Rekha Seth's clinic on the phone and they said they do not give free touch-ups for missed areas. So I was just wondering if they at least overlap properly.

    7. I know you went through about 120 hours of electrolysis before switching to laser. How much did electrolysis help? Did it give you any reduction at all? Asking this question because if electrolysis did give you significant reduction, it would mean laser settings used on you must have been comparatively high (high settings can be used on less dense hair) and so I'd not compare my settings with yours.

    8. How many sessions have you had by far?

    9. How much is the reduction?

    10. How often do you need to shave now to maintain a clean face?

    ReplyDelete
  85. 11. After how many sessions, did the five-o-clock shadow go away?

    12. How much has HRT helped you with chest hair?

    I can't wax or shave- I get boils and terrible terrible in-growths and they leave ugly scars. And I HATE having chest hair! :( So, I'm thinking of laser but I'm not sure if laser will work on my chest and abdomen as the hair growth is fine. I have dark long hair but they do not seem to be thick/coarse enough to be affected by laser. In fact, there is a risk of laser induced growth. :(:(

    I have been reading a lot about hormones and their effect on body hair but the information on the internet seems to be flawed. There are trans women who say their chest hair "disappeared completely" in a year or two on hormones. But I don't understand how it's possible. So my main questions are:

    A) What kind of hair-in terms of density(total number of hairs) and coarseness(thickness of the hair)- did you have on chest and abdomen pre-HRT?

    B) And HOW did HRT help?

    Did HRT help you in reducing the total number of hairs?( Like some or most disappeared completely)
    OR
    Did it help by making the hair finer(almost vellus)?

    And if the answer to the second question is yes, do you still need to wax or shave? Or is the vellus hair almost invisible?

    C) How long did it take for HRT to affect chest and abdomen hair significantly?

    D)I'm not sure if this would be a very good question to ask. But uhmm, do you know how other trans women have dealt with chest hair? You know any Indian trans woman who has got laser or electrolysis done on chest and abdomen? Can you tell me how their experiences have been? I do not want to know their names or contact details or anything like that. Just wanna know how it went and if it's a good idea.

    13. Did Minoxidil help you with hair on the front? I've read that it works only on the center and back portions of the scalp and doesn't always help with receding frontal hairline.

    14. I have also read that we lose most of the hair we gain from Minoxidil as soon as we discontinue it. Two doctors I have consulted seem to disagree on this. How has your experience with Minoxidil been? Do you still use it? If yes, do you plan to continue using it for the rest of your life?

    15. Did you have any form of hair removal in the perineum area before or after surgery? Dr. Chettawut's website says it is not NECESSARY but it would be a good thing to do. Does it really make any difference?

    16. Do you know any good experienced electrologist in Mumbai or Pune?

    17. Do you know any trans-friendly hairstylist in Mumbai?

    18. Did you ever get hyperpigmentation or any form of scarring from laser or electrolysis? If yes, how long did it take to resolve?

    Please please reply soon. Thank you.

    ReplyDelete
  86. Can you also tell me the doctor/technician's name who did laser on you at Dr. Rekha Seth's clinic? I just want to make sure I'm being treated by someone experienced as I can't afford to get one more scab.

    ReplyDelete
  87. "To make an honest confession, I did hurry a few things and am still paying the price for it"-- what things did you hurry up? and what went wrong? can you please share?

    ReplyDelete
  88. hey gazal am still weighting for your reply. zysha

    ReplyDelete
  89. Hi Ghazal, how are you??
    got to know about you through one of my friend who was in MNIT with you, since then m reading all your articles your blogs ur interviews, really hats off to you, now i am a great fan of yours. One more thing which i need to tell you Ghazal that you are really very beautiful.....

    ReplyDelete
  90. What scars was electrolysis leaving on your face? dark spots? did they finally disappear? if yes, how long did they take to disappear?

    how many hairs did your electrologist remove per minute?

    ReplyDelete
  91. Hi Gazal,

    I hope you are doing great!
    Gazal I have read couple of blogs posted by you, and really admire your courage and approach towards life. I am 32 year old person, who have been tried best to adjust to expectations of family and society. From my childhood onwards I have always considered myself as girl, which became more and more difficult as I grew up, because you are always supposed to fall in line which was decided my your birth. In my desperate search to find solution, I came across your blog and much to my delight came to know that I am not alone in this world who have been through this so called disorder (?) of gender identity. Now I am determined to transform my life for better, and have decided to opt for everything which can help me to realize my dream of living life as women. I am fully aware that even after surgery I won't be a fertile women, but than been a female itself is nothing short of nirvana to me. I don't know anyone whom I can consult to get guidance to start this transformation... and sincerely hope that you would help me in providing right direction to achieve this, as you have been already through all this.
    I am not able to decide, what should be the first step to start this procedure. I believe its psychiatrist evaluation, which would certify me as transgender with gender identity disorder.. if I have to go for this evaluation, are their any specialized psychiatrist who are authorized to give this certificate (I live in Bangalore, can you recommend some psychiatrist whom i can meet to get this evaluation). How many sessions are typically required with psychiatrist team to get this evaluation.
    I have read about hormonal therapy which could be started before sex reassignment surgery. Malika how sooner would you recommend me to get started with this therapy. What are the expected results of this therapy? I am little bit afraid about surgery, so possibly would like to depend on hormones for development/augmentation of breast (which I have read can be B-cup size on hormone therapy), I would be quite satisfied with moderate size breast. What is your suggestion on this hormone therapy. I believe these hormones have to be continued life long, please confirm. Are there any side-effects you have experienced because of these hormones.
    If everything goes as per my expectations, I am planning to go for sex reassignment surgery in Saifee hospital Mumbai.. Where did you got operated and how much time it took for complete hospitalization and total recovery. Was your operation invasion or colonic type. Any information about this operation would be very helpful. Is vagina, functional after this surgery, i.e. does it have orgasmic capacity?? Because eventually I would like to get married as normal women and I do understand sexual intimacy is indispensable part of normal married life. I know its very personal matter, but would be very happy if you can share your overall experience. After surgery I have planned to go for hair removal treatment, please guide me with this also. After all this procedure, I would like to attend new identity with name change etc. what is process which one have to follow in India to achieve new identity in India.
    Gazal, I know I am bothering you with so many questions, I think you would empathize with me and would understand my current state of mind which is occupied with so many questions, concerns and doubts. I'll wait for your help and guidance.
    Looking forward for your relpy

    ReplyDelete
  92. ^^^ Have you even bothered going through all the posts on this blog? You can easily find the answers to all your questions except one if you REALLY go through all the posts and comments on this blog. lauras-playground and tsroadmap might be helpful as well.

    For psychiatrist referrals, you can try joining this YAHOO group called "Sampoorna"

    If you really want to transition, get your lazy ass working. No one empathizes (and shouldn't) with a lazy person.

    ReplyDelete
  93. Hi Sister!
    I am also like you.
    I also became woman after
    SRS.I feel pride to be a
    woman.

    ReplyDelete
  94. Hi Gazal,
    I read your story from Kannada News Paper Kannadaprabha dated 31/07/2013 and It Looks so interesting. I also visited your Facebook Profile and u really looks beautiful. Nobody can imagine what has happened in the past....Live your life with all the happiness...

    ReplyDelete
  95. Hello Gazal, before say something I am saying sorry to you because I gone say some thing openly. 1st time I saw you in Satyamevjayate in youtube, because I am staying out of India for my job. I am also a big fan of this program, and now also your fan. I just saw the program completely and I try to search to contact you and I got this blogsite. Hope you don't mind what I gone a say you.
    WILL YOU MARRY ME???
    If you need to talk with me here is my gmail id pinakichowdhury14@gmail.com
    Mobile: +2347045711977
    You can connect me anytime.

    ReplyDelete
  96. Hi gazal howz u? Things must have been not so easy for you. The change that u have made to ur life is truely great n must say will motivate many who has been quiet about how they feel. I have question...i wanted to know howz how after surgery..healthwise..anythin one needs to aware
    Daniel

    ReplyDelete
  97. Hi gazal howz u? Things must have been not so easy for you. The change that u have made to ur life is truely great n must say will motivate many who has been quiet about how they feel. I have question...i wanted to know howz r things after surgery..healthwise..anythin one needs to b aware of
    Daniel

    ReplyDelete
  98. Please mam..I need some information about srs.need some money please ek br bt krlijie mujse..I am a girl nisha

    ReplyDelete
  99. Hi gazal how to talk to you....have many questions to ask...can u reply

    ReplyDelete
  100. Hi gazal..how r u?..i wish i could get to tak wd u....

    ReplyDelete
  101. hi gazal

    i m from uttarakhand. since long time i also feel as i love feminine wardrobes. i enjoy wearing female clothes. i don't want male to be my frnds. i prefer girls to be my frnd but my family does not understand. i also dont like to do job. i wish to do home based work.

    ReplyDelete
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Civility check done? :-)